Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Soul unsettled

I just realized how long it has been since I last wrote a post...geez!  Part of it was not having time, there has been some changes at work and I have been working a few extra hours and adjusting to some new things, and then just didn't have time when I got home.  Part of it was not really having alot to write about to be honest.  My mind and soul have been stuck in a bad place lately and I am not sure why.  So that makes it extra hard to write, because my thoughts are all over the place.  For some reason I feel so tormented.  I am hoping it is nothing a week at the beach won't heal, just to make it the next few weeks until then!  I can't wait to sit and listen the the sound of the waves and the piece and quiet of it all.  I am so looking forward to the relaxation and seeing my little man's eyes when he sees the ocean for the first time.  I am not sure how the sand will go give the fact right now he is afraid of the grass. 
We had a nice Easter, it is so hard for me to sit here and write that it was Noah's 2nd one!  I wish I could say that it was great weather and we were able to have the egg hunt for Noah and my niece and nephew outside but that would be a lie.  To be truthful I think we had more snow for Easter than Christmas.  Got to love good old Western PA in the spring.  Indoors or out the kids had a great time.  The older 2 were told before hand anything right out in the open was off limits to them and were for Noah.  For the most part they were good about it and fair with him.  He really wasn't much into it and once he got 1 for each hand he was happy with those.  It was funny to watch him because he would shake them to see if there was anything in them, you know learning young to look for money ones.  But it was still exciting to see him want to be apart of it a little bit.  Last year he was just a 6 week old baby and this year he is pretty much a toddler. I would love to post pictures of him in his dress pants, vest and tie; but I am still just afraid to at this point.  The scammers stealing photos really have me freaked out still.
He is getting more brave in the things he is doing and has taken a few steps on his own and then realizes what he is doing and then drops to the ground.  He will walk up the steps if you hold on to his hands and walk behind him.  The weather here has finally gotten nice and we have been able to be outside to play.  Sunday Joe was able to hang the swing Aunt Wendy got Noah for his birthday and he loves it.  The Easter bunny brought him a bubble lawn mower and we tried to use that tonight but the weight on it is uneven and he still puts to much weight on the handle to walk so it kept tipping over.  I think in a couple weeks he will be off like a shot with it. 
He was sick at the beginning of the week with a double ear infection and runny nose but seems to be feeling better.  When we were at the doctor on Monday he weighed a little over 22 lbs and was 32 inches long.  She told us she thinks he is going to be tall and thin; maybe a basketball player?!    Noah will be set up to be able to do anything he wants to do because his dad and I started his college fund for him.  We made a promise to him, us and his birth family we would do everything we could to make sure he is able to succeed in life and that is the first step.  I want Noah to know he can do anything he wants and be anything he wants.  My parents letting my brother and I dream and be who we were growing up is why we are the people we are today.  We were never told any dream we had was to big or to small.  My parents telling me I could do anything is one of the big reasons I am able to say I am a mother.  I never gave up on my dream, so I want the same things for him.


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