Friday, November 7, 2014

The Last Time

To say the past few days have been trying would be an understatement to say the least.  We have all had colds going on a week or more at our house and everyone is a little on the cranky side.  With my husband working 2nd shift there is no walk away time in the evenings for a sick mommy as well.  I am not telling you anything you all haven't been through before but it is still trying at times.  Last night I think I had hit that I have had enough point of Noah thinking he was a dog and eating out of a bowl on the floor and cleaning food up like 100 times and then him coming by where I was folding clothes and hanging dress clothes and tearing them off the hanger for no reason at all, I was over it.  I yelled at him smacked his butt and said it's bed time.  As we were spending our quiet time in his room rocking before he went to bed he wrapped his arms around me and said "Mommy I love you" but it doesn't come out as love, it is more uve, and gave me a big kiss I said and cried.  I cried because it had been a hard week, I cried because I had waited for so long for these moments, and have taken advantage of them the past few days.  I saw a post this morning and thought how fitting that I need to keep this in mind, that someday soon, he will say Love, and he won't want quiet rock time, and he won't want to pretend he is a puppy on the floor.  And I will long for these days again just like I did before.  Below is the poem I saw, I want to share it for everyone to read to remind them, that we need to just slow down sometimes.

The Last Time
From the moment you hold your baby in your arms you will never be the same
You might long for the person you were before
When you had freedom and time and nothing in particular to worry about
You will know tiredness like you never knew it before
And days will run into days that are exactly the same

Full of feedings and burping, Nappy changes and crying
Whining and fighting, Naps or lack of naps
It might seem like a never-ending cycle

But don’t forget….
There is a last time for everything
There will come a time when you will feed your baby for the very last time
They will fall asleep on you after a long day and it will be the last time you every hold your sleeping child
One day you will carry them on your hip then set them down and never pick them up that way again
You will scrub their hair in the bath at night and from that day on they will want to bathe alone

They will hold your hand to cross the road then never reach for it again
They will creep into your room at midnight for cuddles

And it will be the last night you ever wake to this
One afternoon you will sing “the wheels on the bus” and do all the actions then never sing them that song again
They will kiss you goodbye at the school gate then the next day they will ask to walk to the gate alone
You will read a final bedtime story and wipe your last dirty face
They will run to you with arms raised for the very last time

The thing is, you won’t even know it’s the last time
Until there are no more times…and even then, it will take you a while to realize

So while you are living in these times, remember there are only so many of them and when they are gone, you will yearn for just one more day of them.
For one last time –

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